Yes, you are mega-awesome. Quiet those voices in your head that keep saying “you should, you shouldn’t, you should’ve” before you “should” yourself (get it? should yourself? Innuendo? Yo?). Mom guilt is on timeout. Yes laugh, it’s good for you. Nobody likes a pout-pout fish.
I know. I know. Your brain feces are out of control and sound like this...
You should quit work because your kids are out of control. Nah, you should make money to pay for college tuition. You should get a better job so you can pay for your kids to go to any school in the WORLD! You should not spend money on the ikat rug you saw on HGTV. Your house should look like an HGTV house! Well, you should clean your house at least. You should stay home more to clean your house. You shouldn't get so crazy in your head, it's probably from too much TV like watching ungodly hours of Real Housewives when you should be running 5 miles. You should work part time. Well if you have free time you should take online courses. Should the kids go to private school? Are the kids really “ok” at their grandma’s…playing with their friends (OMG the horror) and playing in the sprinklers (no please stop please)? Are they eating the right food (mac n cheese from a box!? Whaaa???) You should home school them and be like that Pioneer Lady and make science experiments while canning jelly. You should definitely have a career and do what you love. You should be volunteering more at school and make all organic, homemade, gluten free, sugar free dinners so your kids don’t get cavity bugs. Really smelly brain fecal matter.
Here’s the point…There is NEVER a PERFECT. You will always think it’s greener on the other side. Hey Aspiring Mom of the Year, do you understand the words “it’s a balance”? Really?
Megan the Alter Ego is thinking…Yes!!! It means less work, more kid time, dirtier house, less cleaning, more cleaning, more recreational classes, less TV, more date nights…
Yeah, thought so…How can you weigh these things? It’s completely subjective which is the dirty little secret…Balance is in the mind, not in the physical.
Definition of Subjective according to dictionary.com:
1. existing in the mind; belonging to the thinking subject rather than to the object of thought (opposed to objective ). pertaining to or characteristic of an individual; personal
If you believe in yourself, in your decisions, in doing what YOU think is best, those mom guilt voices go away. If you live each day in the present, look down at your two feet and the path they are currently on and not in the future or in the past, it’s easier to balance. If you see all the good instead of the white space in between, you will know it’s all ok and will be ok. Look at your kid’s perfect golden blue eyes as he says he’s hungry for the third time in a row instead of at the mess of crumbs on the floor behind him. Listen to the imaginary play in the other room instead of voice in your head ticking off the list of things you should be doing in that moment. Look at three siblings playing nicely together in the sand instead of worrying about the amount of sand that's down their underwear and in dark dark cracks.
I don’t think mom guilt will ever go away. It’s a genetic disease that exists in the female birthing population. Don’t let it get debilitating. You can live with it. Remember be grateful for those first steps, the roof over heads, the food in bellies, and that little nonsensical-just-cause-present you bought because it made you happy. #firstworldproblems Life is good. Kill off that mom guilt and stop “should-ing yourself” because frankly that’s just unpleasant.
Love ya girl. You are doing awesome.
Just Megan
P.S. If your husband reads this he will say “duh, that’s exactly what I’ve tried to tell you”! Just smile and sweetly say you only listen to the voices in your head. Entertainment! Laugh. It’s fun.
